My Home Feels Off – Stella Studio’s step-by-step guide to understanding what’s working against you

Have you ever opened the door to your home and asked yourself "Why do I feel uneasy in my house?". It's not particularly untidy, or outdated, it's just a vibe. For now. In this blog post I'm going to give you a step by step method to figuring out what feels off in your home and get rid of that negative energy that might be eating you up without you noticing. And before you look for decoration tips, no I'm not going to tell you to clean, de-clutter and change the paint color on the walls, this is a little deeper than that with actual advice not written by AI. So, take a notebook, a pencil and take your time with the following:

Step 1 - Have a conversation with yourself.

Go sit down in each space that feels wrong. Close your eyes, take three deep breaths and slowly open your eyes again.

Calmly, softly observe.

Observe what’s around you, and spell out what you see.

The table, the lamp, the ceiling fan, the Tv etc. and just sit with every emotion that each piece brings you.

Similarly to a Mary Kondo method the — what brings you joy? —  question works here too. As we sit in our space and watch our emotions change when focusing on a piece of furniture, the view out the window, how cold are feet are on the tiled floor… If we listen to the emotion close enough, we’ll soon find out what’s wrong.

These emotional cues reveal functional or aesthetic issues. Make a note of all of them on paper and move on to the next room. Repeat the process in every room and move on to no2

Step 2 - Functional Analysis

Next sit up and walk around each space. Do you bump into a table corner to access your back door? Do you have to scootch and bend and reach to grab something you need when you’re cooking or alternatively walk back and forth? Do you have to move furniture around to do a specific task? Do you hide things that are usually out in the open when you have guests (I’m not talking about putting away the odd papers and coats laying around, but furniture or useful everyday items you constantly hide and then take back out)?

Here we’re assessing if your space supports your lifestyle. Sometimes the problem isn’t visual — it’s practical. For example, your living room might feel “off” because the seating arrangement discourages conversation, or a kitchen might feel chaotic because storage isn’t intuitive.

Once you’ve written down ALL of this, think of the why. Why is the cutlery drawer so far away from the prepping station. Why do you need to take 5 steps before you can put the dish you had in the oven down etc.

Step 3 - Sensory Check

This one is trickier because we’re not all wired the same when it comes to our senses. Some of us

— Hi, it’s me, I’m the problem it’s me — are very sensitive to light and textures and we’ll immediately know that this light, that carpet and this sofa are all wrong for us. But some of you will have a harder time noticing the impact bad lighting will have on your mood. So here’s my rule of thumb when it comes to lighting:

• soft, yellow and diffused light in spaces meant to calm. Ie: living room, the dining table, the central kitchen light, particularly if you have kitchen island, the toilets etc.

• colder, direct light in spaces meant for appointed tasks: kitchen counter, makeup vanity, stairs, corridor etc.

  
  

Now the trick is that some spaces need both (most rooms needs layered lighting if I'm honest but let me give you one that matter the most here).

The bathroom needs both. Combine a soft diffused ceiling light with white light around the bathroom mirror. The bedroom also needs both, a soft diffused ceiling light in the center of the room and sharper whiter (but not too white) light for your bedside table when reading. I've got a whole blog post about bedroom design and sleeping better right here if you want to know more.

When it comes to materials, well, this is very personal and I taylor-make these decisions according to each of my clients, but if you don’t know what to choose, my advice is to go for what is the most natural. The floor? Wood or stone. The textiles? Linen or cotton. Furniture? Wood. And I mean real wood, not mdf. Bringing in natural textures in a place not only visually warms it up, but something in our primal nature will be instantly soothed by its presence.

Bringing it all together (and knowing when to ask for help)

If you’ve followed these three steps honestly, you now have something incredibly valuable: clarity. Not a Pinterest board. Not a shopping list. But a real understanding of why your home feels the way it does — and what’s quietly working against you. So, gather up your notes and slowly tackle your issues — move the furniture, adjust the lighting, reorganize your entire kitchen, or replace a few key pieces. Even small, thoughtful changes can have a massive impact.

However, and particularly if you’ve done this exercise in your entire home and it took you a few hours. You

might feel completely overwhelmed by the amount of things to be changed, you may start and in the midst of it get decision fatigue (more on that particular topic here), or maybe you don’t have the time for all that trial and error. That could potentially mean that you need the help of an interior designer and space-planner (again, Hi, it’s me hi!). Not to impose a style or vision, but to translate everything you’ve uncovered into a coherent, functional, and emotionally supportive space — one that feels calm without being boring, practical without being cold, and beautiful without trying too hard.

Your home should hold you.

It should make daily life easier, softer, and more joyful —And if reading this made you think, “Yes… that’s exactly what’s missing,” then the conversation has already begun.

Let's talk soon to Make Your Place Yours

Xx

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Author: Estelle Bogros